Knowing is Half the Prattle.

Thursday, June 26, 2008

NUTEX or Ex Nuts?

It's interesting that whenever someone discovers something, there is always someone who is ready with the next quack medicine that claims the medicinal properties of that thing. Case in pont ... Nutex brand condoms. Coated with radium. For her pleasure?

"Get next to Nutex" Ask for them by name. Keep a dosimeter handy.

More fun radioactive products of yesteryear at the Oak Ridge Universities Historical Instrumentation Collection Museum.

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

DIY Laser Show

Years ago when I was in high school a friend (Dave) and I put together a laser show as part of a battle of the bands. Actually, it was mostly Dave because he owned the computer which controlled it. Here's someone who is doing basically the same thing but these days, you don't have to hit up your physics teacher to borrow a laser. Still a cool idea. The way we did it was cooler (of course) because instead of just mounting the mirrors on a speaker to synch with the music, we had a computer where you would hit buttons and trigger your own sounds. Those sounds were preset so that you would repeat the best patterns. Since the concert was so loud and the laser speaker was up in the lighting booth you couldn't hear the computer sounds from the audience. I think.

The Fly, The Opera

The Fly, The Opera ...... The horror... Oh, the horror.

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Alternative Energy Vehicles

Are you as sick of news stories about [fill in the next upstart company] and their new [pick your favorite fad fuel that isn't gas] car that is going to change the world? I'm sick of those stories. When you find a company that actually starts producing real cars rather than concept cars and maybe even actually producing and selling more than 10 prototypes, give me a call. Otherwise, I've had enough of your pointless news stories.

Monday, June 23, 2008

New for 2008

Aden (left) and Mikayla (right).

Friday, June 20, 2008

I Need to Get the Sheet Music for This.

Yes if you've ever wanted to play John Cage's orchestral masterpiece 4'33" (4 minutes 33 seconds), now you can buy the sheet music for it online. It's a steal at only $5.95 plus shipping. Click here to order. With comments like .. "Most versatile work in my repetoire" it's a must for any beginning musician.

If you've never heard this master work, then here is a video of the BBC Symphony Orchestra playing it

This is the Definition of Performance Art.

There are two required elements for something to be performance art.

1) Nudity
2) Nonsense

This video is the very definition of performance art.

Thursday, June 19, 2008

DNA tested McCaws?

Someone is giving away hyacinth macaws on craigslist. In the ad they state ...

"these are lovely birds they are well tamed and they also DNA tested interested person get to me via ..."

DNA tested? Yeah lady, it looks like a hyacinth macaw but can you prove it? I'm not taking this bird off your hands without proof.

Hey this parrot is nailed to the perch.

What do you mean pining?

Monday, June 16, 2008

You want to ask me about your office?

I got this e-mail today.

"Schlesinger Associates, a national Marketing Research Firm, is currently organizing a study among men and women in the area regarding health conditions at our mid-town Manhattan offices."

I have no idea what goes on in your mid-town Manhattan offices.

You Can't Resist this Job Applicant. It's Futile.

So I think I'm interviewing a Borg next week. On the resume', the first skills listed are "Excellent technology absorption capability" and "Ability to work effectively in a team environment". You don't hire him, he just assimilates your company.

Saturday, June 07, 2008

The End of Suzi's Television

At one time, that was a good TV.

Monday, June 02, 2008

The Bed to Die For.

I've always thought that the Sleepy's Mattress trademark "For the Rest of Your Life" was a little odd. You could interpret this as ...

1) You'll keep coming back to Sleepy's because we're so good.
2) You'll get a great night's rest from this bed.

Or you could also interpret it as "This is your death bed". Apparently this association was also lost on the Hannah mattress company because they also tried to register the trademark.