Knowing is Half the Prattle.

Tuesday, May 02, 2006

A Bunch of Fruits

In many countries in the world you eat what is available. Local cuisine is usually based on what people can get. Seems simple right? Well what if you live in a country where everything is available and plentiful? In the US, you're living in it. As a kid I even remember there being seasonal fruits. Now it doesn't seem like there is such a thing. Anyway, so now you're in this society of plenty and your choice of food is practically unlimited. What do you do? You invent some new restriction on your food to stabilize your gastronomical keel. Behold the The Frutarian! It's the latest random set of food rules to keep your eating choices simple. (Veg-Aquarians, you have been unseated!)

What are the benefits? (you may ask)

"To be a fruitarian is to be free from all forms of cooked food addiction…"

I have to tell you I'm a confessed "cooked food" addict. I can't tell you how many times I've craved a hot meal. Glad I got into the cooked food addicts anonymous program.

"The proper application of fruitarian dietary and lifestyle is calculated to allow the human to produce healthy offspring, live more than 100 years of age...."

They're quoting someone or some institute or something that they don't cite, that did some sort of calculation that they don't specify. But it sure sounds scientific. It must be true.

Oh and it also cures every disease known to mankind including cancer, AIDS, Hepatites C and gangrene.

Unfortunately they don't name all the benefits of only eating fruit. Namely, vitamin deficiency and diarrhea.

Add this to the list of other random sets of food rules to help you organize your life.

My personal random food rule is not to eat any food that is masquerading as another food. Yeah, I'm looking at you tofu hotdog!

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